This is the feeling that filled my heart this morning as I finished reading my scriptures. I took a moment to soak it in and wonder in awe at the amazing way things fall into place. They take their course and work themselves out.
At this time last year, was the beginning of turmoil and struggles that seemed endless. I had just come back to America in March. I had no job, no home, no money and nowhere to lay my head at night. It was so devastating after having been so independent and earning well for a while before I had to leave to India. I was also in a brand new relationship and this put such a strain on both of us.
There were days and sometimes a few days in a row when things just seemed bleak and I did not know if I had the strength to pull myself up and put a smile on my face. I wondered what direction my life was going to take and if I would be prepared for what was ahead. The one thing I knew with absolute certainty was that the Lord would not abandon me. He has come through for me many times before and I knew He would again. I just kept hoping that I was learning all that I was supposed to learn and changing where I needed to be changed. This does not mean that the struggles went away or that I did not have any bad days any more. Those still persisted, but I received the comfort and strength of the Lord through various people, especially Aaron, and things started to get better.
I had to learn new things – to rid myself of pride, learn to give more freely of what I had, and it was easier this time, because I had nothing to give in terms of material things, so I gave other things like friendship and love; I had to learn to be humble by interviewing for jobs that never would have crossed my mind earlier, and actually accept one for a few weeks – that taught me more humility.
I worked hard and prayed that the Lord would fill in the rest. Gradually, once the storm subsides, and you are stripped naked of all those things that have weighed you down for a long time, you know that you have done your best and that the Lord will reward you by blessing you more than you know. This experience has strengthened and brought Aaron and I closer to each other. My blessings are abundant, my heart is full and I am grateful.
Thanks Yolanda, that is a great quote. I especially like the idea that humility is not so much what you do, but what you are willing to acknowledge and what things you are willing to "re-do." We are all fellow mortals (you're better than no on and no one is better than you), and as mortals we are inevitably going to make mistakes. Also, retracing one's steps implies not only humility, acceptance and understanding, but it also suggests patience, and an overall lack of haste when going about the business of life. I wonder, being that so much of the world's most profound wisdom comes from India, what effect does that have on the average(whatever "average" means)Indian person? Thanks again Yolanda.
Thanks Yolanda, that is a great quote. I especially like the idea that humility is not so much what you do, but what you are willing to acknowledge and what things you are willing to "re-do." We are all fellow mortals (you're better than no on and no one is better than you), and as mortals we are inevitably going to make mistakes. Also, retracing one's steps implies not only humility, acceptance and understanding, but it also suggests patience, and an overall lack of haste when going about the business of life. I wonder, being that so much of the world's most profound wisdom comes from India, what effect does that have on the average(whatever "average" means)Indian person? Thanks again Yolanda.
What fun! I've been thinking I am a stomach all day, and my co-workers are other organs and I must admit I do feel a greater sense of comaraderie, though I must confess that I have not given the most flattering organs to the co-workers that are not my favorites!
What fun! I've been thinking I am a stomach all day, and my co-workers are other organs and I must admit I do feel a greater sense of comaraderie, though I must confess that I have not given the most flattering organs to the co-workers that are not my favorites!
woops, that should be "mankind" – a Freudian (eg0) slip perhaps?
Hilarie,
I like the line, "You're better than no one and no one is better than you." As for turning the other cheek, I think that may tend more toward tolerance than humility. Perhaps true humility has more to do with what some Asian philosophies call the "Buddha mind", which is often understood to mean the unconscious mind. It is only the conscious mind (or ego) that makes one person feel superior to another. Just as the different organs of the body work together without a feeling of importance (the stomach doesn't sit there thinking it is "superior" to the kidneys, or the liver), human beings when they are acting "unconsciously" may tend to treat others as equal and necessary parts in the fabric (organism) of society. Of course, even in the body the conscious mind can start to think it is the most important organ, which usually leads to ignoring the the needs of the other organs and abusing the body with lack of exercise, overeatig, drugs, alcohol, etc. – another benefit of focusing on the unconscious mind, so they say, is that it expose the illusion of personal ego, and teaches that we are all part of a single collective consciousness. So, I guess, the lesson is to treat others in the same way your stomach treats your liver, as mutually beneficial organs in a greater organism called manking.
Hilarie,
I like the line, "You're better than no one and no one is better than you." As for turning the other cheek, I think that may tend more toward tolerance than humility. Perhaps true humility has more to do with what some Asian philosophies call the "Buddha mind", which is often understood to mean the unconscious mind. It is only the conscious mind (or ego) that makes one person feel superior to another. Just as the different organs of the body work together without a feeling of importance (the stomach doesn't sit there thinking it is "superior" to the kidneys, or the liver), human beings when they are acting "unconsciously" may tend to treat others as equal and necessary parts in the fabric (organism) of society. Of course, even in the body the conscious mind can start to think it is the most important organ, which usually leads to ignoring the the needs of the other organs and abusing the body with lack of exercise, overeatig, drugs, alcohol, etc. – another benefit of focusing on the unconscious mind, so they say, is that it expose the illusion of personal ego, and teaches that we are all part of a single collective consciousness. So, I guess, the lesson is to treat others in the same way your stomach treats your liver, as mutually beneficial organs in a greater organism called manking.
Hi all! I'm from North Chicago so I should know something about humility (the Cubs haven't won the world series in over 100 years!), but oddly enough, many Cubs fans seem to be proud to have such a losing tradition. So, is humility really humility if you are proud of your humility?
Hi all! I'm from North Chicago so I should know something about humility (the Cubs haven't won the world series in over 100 years!), but oddly enough, many Cubs fans seem to be proud to have such a losing tradition. So, is humility really humility if you are proud of your humility?
Woops, accidentally sent my response before I finished writing it… I enjoyed your descriptions of India. I've never been but it sounds fascinating. I thought your comments about humility were a bit curious. You say that you had to learn humility when you were obliged to apply for jobs that you normally would not have applied for, and that you "even" took one of those jobs for a few weeks. It strikes me that true humility implies an understanding that no job is beneath us. Saying you "even" took one of those jobs suggests that you still consider the job beneath you and that you consider yourself superior to those who do that job. Humility is a tremendously difficult thing to learn, especially in a world that is constantly assaulting us with its daily crap. Telling ourselves how great we are is often a necessary defense mechanism. I have maybe experienced one or two fleeting moments of humility in my life, and I hope to experience more moments in the future, for in the end humilty is the greatest virture, for it leads to compassion, which leads to love.
I hope I have not been too critical in this first response. I find your blog entries colorful and intellectually stimulating.
Keep on blogging…. Johnny
Woops, accidentally sent my response before I finished writing it… I enjoyed your descriptions of India. I've never been but it sounds fascinating. I thought your comments about humility were a bit curious. You say that you had to learn humility when you were obliged to apply for jobs that you normally would not have applied for, and that you "even" took one of those jobs for a few weeks. It strikes me that true humility implies an understanding that no job is beneath us. Saying you "even" took one of those jobs suggests that you still consider the job beneath you and that you consider yourself superior to those who do that job. Humility is a tremendously difficult thing to learn, especially in a world that is constantly assaulting us with its daily crap. Telling ourselves how great we are is often a necessary defense mechanism. I have maybe experienced one or two fleeting moments of humility in my life, and I hope to experience more moments in the future, for in the end humilty is the greatest virture, for it leads to compassion, which leads to love.
I hope I have not been too critical in this first response. I find your blog entries colorful and intellectually stimulating.
Keep on blogging…. Johnny
I enjoyed your
I enjoyed your
“I claim to be a simple individual liable to err like any other fellow mortal. I own, however, that I have humility enough to confess my errors and to retrace my steps.” – Mahatma Gandhi.
Hello Johnny and Hilarie, thanks for the comments so far. What do you both think about the above quote? Johnny, I really enjoyed your last post and it made me ponder the ideas mentioned within.
Sorry Yolanda! I didn't mean you were proud of being humbled! I was just asking a general question. I think a discusion about humility is interesting. Reminds me of a line from a song called "Ramona" that goes "You're better than no one and no one is better than you." But I agree with Johnny that you have to be proud (even arrogant) sometimes when people are disrespecting you and you need to defend yourself. I guess I'm not very good at "turning the other cheek."
Sorry Yolanda! I didn't mean you were proud of being humbled! I was just asking a general question. I think a discusion about humility is interesting. Reminds me of a line from a song called "Ramona" that goes "You're better than no one and no one is better than you." But I agree with Johnny that you have to be proud (even arrogant) sometimes when people are disrespecting you and you need to defend yourself. I guess I'm not very good at "turning the other cheek."
Oh dear! I must not have expressed myself very well in this post if I am misleading everybody. Hilarie, thank you for the comment and I liked the question you posed. I don't why I feel like I need to say this, but realization of a humbling moment or several moments in one's life is not pride. I hope that I did not infer that I was proud of the fact that I had been humbled. I was merely expressing a realization of a moment of humility, the act of which helps me remember the reasons I needed humbling in the first place and to strive hard to learn the lesson. You are right: humility is not something to be proud of – it takes away the very meaning of the word.
Oh dear! I must not have expressed myself very well in this post if I am misleading everybody. Hilarie, thank you for the comment and I liked the question you posed. I don't why I feel like I need to say this, but realization of a humbling moment or several moments in one's life is not pride. I hope that I did not infer that I was proud of the fact that I had been humbled. I was merely expressing a realization of a moment of humility, the act of which helps me remember the reasons I needed humbling in the first place and to strive hard to learn the lesson. You are right: humility is not something to be proud of – it takes away the very meaning of the word.
Yolanda,
Sorry for misquoting you, I guess I was just nit-picking. Humility is such an elusive thing, especially when there are virtually no models of humility to be seen on TV and the Net. I often reflect upon the relationship of wealth (and the lack of it) to humility. Some of the most inspirational people I have met were simple, poor, Mexicans that I met during my brief travels to their country. I don't plan on becoming a "sanyatsin" (is that the word for an Indian who later in life gives up his material belongings to meditate on the profounder things in life?) who leaves society behind, but there must be a way to live a more profound, meditative live within society.
I enjoy the vivid imagery in your writing. I have not read Willa Cather, but if she does indeed write like you I will check her out.
Looking forward to your next blog,
Johnny
Yolanda,
Sorry for misquoting you, I guess I was just nit-picking. Humility is such an elusive thing, especially when there are virtually no models of humility to be seen on TV and the Net. I often reflect upon the relationship of wealth (and the lack of it) to humility. Some of the most inspirational people I have met were simple, poor, Mexicans that I met during my brief travels to their country. I don't plan on becoming a "sanyatsin" (is that the word for an Indian who later in life gives up his material belongings to meditate on the profounder things in life?) who leaves society behind, but there must be a way to live a more profound, meditative live within society.
I enjoy the vivid imagery in your writing. I have not read Willa Cather, but if she does indeed write like you I will check her out.
Looking forward to your next blog,
Johnny
Hi Johnny,
Thanks for the comments – they are much appreciated. I also liked your insight on humility. I read my entry again and found that I did not say "even" in my entry but rather mentioned that I actually took one of those jobs that I would have previously considered beneath me. But because I had learned but a smidgen of humility through various experiences I took that job because it was not beneath me anymore. I learned something new, I liked it and was grateful for the experience. You are right: Humility is the greatest of all virtue and I believe that it is a life long process that needs fine tuning constantly. Thanks for your opinions and comments. Keep them coming.
Hi Johnny,
Thanks for the comments – they are much appreciated. I also liked your insight on humility. I read my entry again and found that I did not say "even" in my entry but rather mentioned that I actually took one of those jobs that I would have previously considered beneath me. But because I had learned but a smidgen of humility through various experiences I took that job because it was not beneath me anymore. I learned something new, I liked it and was grateful for the experience. You are right: Humility is the greatest of all virtue and I believe that it is a life long process that needs fine tuning constantly. Thanks for your opinions and comments. Keep them coming.
P.S. – your description of riding an Indian train would indeed make a good book, or if not a book at least a good short story. Maybe the story to tell would be the story of your mother's life, all told in flashbacks as she takes the train to and from work one more day.
P.S. – your description of riding an Indian train would indeed make a good book, or if not a book at least a good short story. Maybe the story to tell would be the story of your mother's life, all told in flashbacks as she takes the train to and from work one more day.